If you aren't already

I have succumb to temptation for the sake of increasing readership...

More people have to know what goes on inside my twisted mind.

Follow me! Tweet tweet!

Kings: First Night

Here is what I noticed while watching tonight's episode:

Poor little rich boy, Prince Chuck Bass, seems to have a large whopping crush on our hero, Dah-veed. How funny would THAT be if they fucked? (I smell a SWEEPS stunt...)

The bumbling security guards provided for comedic effect are wonderful- they deserve more airtime.

Queenie looks like a cheap knockoff of Robin Wright Penn. 

Poor straight-edge Dah-veed. Little baggies make him sweat uncomfortably. 

Dirty Mistress has uncomfortably high cheekbones. Kingy-poo's money probably provided more than enough money for plastic surgery to make that possibly. But I'm not being unjustly judgemental. When a show is as boring thusfar as this episode, I HAVE to find things to amuse myself.

MICHAEL ARDEN!!!! Prince Chuck Bass' lover gave this show a whole new level of cred. 

Sickboy Bastard Child should just die. It'd make things a whole lot easier. And it would provide just enough internal conflict for Kingy-poo that it'll make for good-ish tv.

Rich man didn't want to see Michelle's cooter? He chose the King's socks instead. Good choice, homo. (I love the gays. It's a term of endearment)

DIE SICKBOY DIE!!! 

That car "crash" was fucking awesome. And as anti-animal cruelty as I am, the fact that the King of the Wrinkles hit a deer was hilarious.

I have come to the conclusion that Prince Chuck Bass is a masochist. How else can you explain what happened at the cluuuub?

The last 15 minutes were good. 

Skins: Season 3 Finale

When JJ had his swearing tangent, I blushed. He was so incredibly adorable. Poor JJ, I love him so.

And those straightedge guys. So funny. I can't even handle it.

Freddie's masturbation scene was classic. Loved it.

YES! Effy loves Freddie! 

And that race was so funny: I was so proud of JJ. It's adorable: the best talents he has are the WuShu Fingerhold and Carrying Old People. Oh, and giving inspirational words of wisdom to those in need. 

And I thought straightedge boy was straightedge, so why was he drinking a beer after he lost? That violates the rules of the straight-edge-ship. 

How "She's All That" when Cook went all "Your prince charming made a bet on you!"

If Cook pushing his dad off of their stolen boat is the climactic ending I was fearing, as good as it was, it was kind of disappointing. Seriously, what fucky kind of ending was that! 

Uh Oh

I am super-excited for "Southland" the new NBC show starring Ben McKenzie and produced by the creators of ER. But how is a girl to keep up with all of this TV and a full course load? It's on at the same time as the ABC triple-punch...

Well, it starts when Flight of the Conchords and Skins are done with their seasons, so maybe I'll have that extra internet hour for a new cop-drama.

Premieres on NBC on April 9 at 10PM

Kings: Goliath

I'm halfway through the pilot, and so far am unconvinced. It is too self-indulgent: it could have been only an hour, but instead the writers let Ian McShane continue on his chicken-egg debate for three minutes... Yes, it has its share of attractive men (by which I mean two) but nothing now is begging me to continue watching. 

Sebastian Stan's character is too Chuck Bass for my tastes (Ed Westwick is enough)... but is he a gay? He seemed to delight quite a bit in making out with a woman while staring intently at a man. Ohp, he is. And Daddy's a homophobe. Super. An unfaithful homophobe with an bastard child. Best kind. 

King Ian arranged all the bad stuff... oy vey, way to overcomplicate things. And Reverend Token Black Man is not only a man of the cloth but also a prophet... okay.

Dying Brother... these "emotional scenes" are toooooooooo contrived. I can't handle it. 

And the alternate-universe-kingdom thing is taking some getting used to. As is the contrived romance and lack of chemistry between Princessy Poo and David (which I am mentally pronouncing with a Spanish accent so it sounds more like dah-veed than day-vid).  I shall call him Dah-veed Mo-lay in honor of the many moles on the right side of his face and neck.  And what a powerful moving blood speech... NOT. The whole time he was shouting, I was really hoping that they'd just shoot him. 

It's decent. The mood of this show is different that that of most of the other shows on TV right now, and so I'm  going to try to get used to it. I think I'll follow this show until its inevitable impending cancellation (and until Macullay Culkin's guest stunt is over). Sad but true. Its numbers aren't good enough, and probably won't ever be.  

New Mindless Drivel

Here are some shows I am excited to let turn my brain into more mush than it already is. They are either spring pickups, summer shows or fall... But I'm too excited about them to keep quiet.

Harper's Island 

Someone gets killed EVERY WEEK. How fucking awesome is that?

Melrose Place

Ashlee... let's see how you do. And you too, Miss Capitalizing on Daddy David Cassidy. And I, for one, will always be a fan of Michael Rady (Greek comes back soon!)

Kings

I know it's on now, but I haven't been able to start it, so I'm pumped for that too.

The Bachelorette

I promised myself that I would drop the show after Jason was a tool, but Jillian is too cute to not watch.

Gossip Girl Spinoff

Sunset strip. The 80s. (So far, it's sounding a whole lot like new Broadway musical "Rock of Ages") and Brittany Snow. I loved American Dreams, so I'm excited to watch her weekly again.

Skins: Emily and Katie

Okay, so I know that it's a different kind of love, but what Katie said to Naomi about Emily being only hers was fucked up.

On the bright side, I'd like to learn "Twin"

And the most entertaining part of the episode was when their brother had to do the pull-ups. I actually laughed out loud. I also laughed out loud when I saw the poster of Tupac in their room and PANDORA DANCING!. Daddy Fitch is the funniest TV tool I've seen in a while. 

Thomas is the cutest ever

Did anyone else notice the Cassie-lookalike at the dance?She appears around 41:32 (on andy21's megavideo)

I don't know how my Thursday nights will be exciting anymore after next week. Even the ABC-triple punch (Betty, Grey's and Private Practice) don't excite me anymore.

Lost: Namaste

This show just gets better and better. Tween Ben and baby Ethan. And I love the fact that Jack is a janitor.

I've always been a Jack-as-leader supporter but Sawyer is refreshing and doing a really good job. Love quadrangle activate!

Skins: Effy

Opening Scene, she is wearing Miley Cyrus tights. Mistake.

That car chase was so intense. And then later, "under the moonlight," my god, I was so on edge. And ps, what kind of gas station was that? Creepersville.

Poor Effy. Cook is such an asshole. And Katie just makes everything worse, always. I was half-hoping she'd get shot by the creepers when she went for her walk alone in the woods. When she was fucking with Effy, it made me so furious. And Ef bashed her in the head with a rock. But when Effy got all Spring Awakening "hit me" masochistic on Freddie, I just laughed. Til they started fucking. 

And her sheets mildly reminded me of Tony's old sheets. Aw, the olden days. 

God, it's getting SOO good. Too bad there are only two episodes left in the season. And I am both dreading and eagerly awaiting the dramatic cliffhanger season ending which has become a Skins staple

Private Practice

Why are they trying to pull a Desperate Housewives and jump a month into the future? Bad move, Shonda.

And so sad that potential love interest for Addy was a skeezeball.

Heroes "Exposed"

IS IT JUST ME OR IS IT COMPLETELY OBVIOUS THAT HRG IS REBEL!!!???

This episode is actually decent. WOW SYLAR BACKSTORY!

Heroes now is reminding me of the second season of Dark Angel, but Heroes got renewed.

Skins: JJ

I love that Katie was fucking Freddie. Hilarious.

I think Thomas is the cutest ever. So it breaks my heart that Pandora and Cook are banging like Jamaican steel drums.

Coming into this episode, I was discouraged- I didn't like JJ and I thought he was a total creeper I'm actually really happy that this episode changed my mind.

And the ending was so sweet. 

Great Episode!

The Bachelor Finale and After the Final Rose Pt1

I don't even understand how Molly's ho-ishness made Jason TURN DOWN the woman he chose to get with her. Ridiculous!

And how embarrassing to have him DUMP poor sweet Melissa ON TV!

 

That's low, even for reality TV. 

The Brothers and Sisters Movie Event: A Running Commentary

I hope this is the episode where they get rid of Tommy. Balthazar Getty is a homewrecker (well, he cavorted with a homewrecker) and America's favorite television family cannot be a vehicle for a homewrecker.

My sweater right now matches Nora's. What does that say about me?

Seriously, Kitty freaked out that much because she wanted them "on the same page"? Ridiculous!

The Walkers are America's favorite alcoholic family.

And Robert has a terrible sense of humor. "It's a boy. It's a girl. It's a zi!"

I thought they all wanted to meet Ryan. But now they've turned into the peanut gallery of naysayers. They were like those guys from the WaMu commercials.

Why isn't Robert the real governor? He has so many brilliant ideas about keeping Cali green. Cali represent!

"Wiggle room" is a fantastic phrase. Why doesn't everyone use it more often?

Why am I saying "Why" so much tonight?

So Kitty and Robert LIVE in Santa Barbara and just commute to Pasadena and Downtown LA all the time? No way.

And it's BABY TIME! Let's pop this fucker out, Sonja Sones (aka female star of SLAM).

I would really like to bone Dave Annable. Right Now.

The baby is "cooked", Julia? That's gross.

I can't wait for California's First Family to have a little black child. 

Ken Olin looks goooooood. And wow, I just learned that he and Patricia Wettig (aka Holly) are married in real life. I thought he was married to Lena Olin (of Alias fame). Good thing sparks like theirs stem from truth.

Every time I see Emily Vandekamp, I think about how much I miss Everwood. Thank Buddha that show came to a conclusion at the end.

I'm bored with commenting on this- my television buddy is  being neglected. 

Lost: The Life and Death of Jeremy Bentham

This episode is brilliant. Great job, writers for beginning to clarify things while still keeping things enshrouded with a sense on imminent doom. This is my favorite episode of the season yet: this season is getting better and better. They're almost starting to make up for the travesty that was season 2.

Something I Miss

Because I really like posting videos, and because today I was thinking about how much I miss the intro to season one of Skins, here you are. You may recognize Dev Patel of Slumdog fame- good job, he was Anwar, the quirky Indian. Dance to it- I know I do.